Yep, right on the heels of my parents’ anniversary comes my own. I actually picked the day because I liked the date and because growing up I always thought today was my parents’ anniversary. I thought making it my own anniversary would help me to remember; instead, I mix them up constantly.
The last two years have been wonderful. It’s only been two years (and give me some credit for saying ‘only’), but I can’t really remember what it’s like to not have Ryan in my life.
It’s funny. My sister is seriously dating this guy, and to see them together and to know that they’re getting serious almost makes me jealous. It’s not that I want her boyfriend—naturally, I prefer Ryan. But to see them together is to remember what it’s like—the breathlessness falling in love and making big plans, the thrill of discovering someone who is just right for you, the excitement of getting to know him better and finding another way to love him and another way that he fits perfectly into your life with each new situation you find yourselves in.
At the time, it seems like it will never end. On one hand, it doesn’t end—but it does change. Either you get so used to the thrill that you become numb to it, or you become so used to being together that the thrill gradually fades to the background.
Either way, it changes. The breathlessness, the thrill and the excitement have been supplanted by sleeplessness, understanding, coziness and comfortableness.
While I was checking to make sure “comfortableness” was a real word, I came across this from WordReference, which I normally use for translations. The primary definition of comfortableness?
|a feeling of being at ease in a relationship|
Happiness, at ease in a relationship, belonging. What an apt description. I like belonging—we belong together; we belong to each other. Sigh. I guess sometimes it’s not so hard to remember what it was like to fall in love. Ryan’s just one of those good cherries.