Comments on: Hayden’s secret identity

By: Leigh

Leigh — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 02:11:46 +0000

This is something I often wondered about. I have been online 8yrs and have always used kids names and pictures (my son’s name is Hayden too)
It was always just a normal thing for me to do that I never worried about. I agree with everyone else who said that real life people are the ones that worry me much more than those online.

By: crunchy

crunchy — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 15:49:45 +0000

Well I use their real names..but I don’t feel I am exploiting them…
My dh goes on about how everything on the web is there forever…but that is the world they are growing up in and will no doubt be even weird cyber wise by the time they are adults.
But I don’t say this is blah and his last name is blah and we all live at…

By: coolbeans

coolbeans — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 15:49:10 +0000

I agree with Kymberlyn, but still don’t disclose names or share pictures of their faces on my public blog posts. Like Laura, my kids know about my blog and use the internet. I can share more than they can because I am an adult, but sharing really specific details that I wouldn’t them share with the public at large? It just doesn’t fit. Nor do they want me to. My oldest has made comments: “You’re showing everyone my picture?” No, just my friends, people I trust. “Why? Do you really know them?”

Exactly.

I do think I lose some potential readers because of this level of anonymity, but I have to live with that. I will snag the readers who enjoy my content and if I want more readers, I will have to step it up and have really consistent, amazing content. Which I don’t. Because it’s mostly brain-spew.

By: Jen

Jen — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 15:32:30 +0000

I started my blog as a way to update my familyabout my kids so from the very start I used their real names and posted pictures. I have a slightly larger readership (is that a real word?) now but it would seem strange to me to change the way I do things now. I’m not really worried about people seeing their pictures or knowing their names. There are bigger concerns in the real world. I agree 100% with what Kymberlyn said. I don’t worry about internet crazies, I worry about real world crazies.

By: Jordan

Jordan — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 03:07:21 +0000

I enjoyed your post on this topic, too, MZ.

I appreciate everyone weighing in. It’s a tough choice, of course, and I don’t think there’s really a wrong answer if it’s what you, your family and your audience are comfortable with.

By: mommyzabs

mommyzabs — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 03:00:00 +0000

i love those pictures. so cute. I personally am one of those unevolved types that does feel more connected to people when I see pictures. I’m quite visual. The nickname thing has been new to me this year. I still use real names because when i started blogging it was for friends and family in 2004! the blog world had not developed to the point it has today and I had no intention of meeting so many amazing people and loving them so much even though I had never met them in person. Those things did end up happening and my blog is what it is today and I did not at some point change everyone’s name. It has been in the last year that I have seen people start using nicknames and at first it confused me… now i get it and respect it, but it is unrealistic to change that aspect of my blog. great post jordan!

By: Mary

Mary — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 02:26:01 +0000

This was an interesting discussion and I have enjoyed reading the points of view on this. I debated it for quite sometime before starting to blog. I don’t use names, just first letters for now, but I do have pictures. Thanks for asking and allowing this discussion – it was nice to see it as a “friendly” chat!

By: Megan at Sortacrunchy

Megan at Sortacrunchy — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 01:15:24 +0000

Great post, Jordan.

I have to say I totally agree with Kymberlyn. I asked Michelle at Scribbit about this very issue and she made a good point – any creep at the mall can take my daughter’s picture without my knowledge and permission and do whatever he/she wants to with it. Maybe I am making it easier for the creeps out there when I post the occasional picture of my daughter on my blog, but if I don’t know what happens to her image and she doesn’t know . . . is it exploiting her? Is it causing her harm? Like Kymberlyn said, there are many real-life, flesh-and-blood predators out there who have much easier and more harmful access to our children.

By: Jordan

Jordan — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 22:00:46 +0000

My thoughts exactly, Kymberlyn.

By: Kymberlyn

Kymberlyn — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 21:07:15 +0000

My children are on my blog. I use their names. At the end of the day the internet is the least of my concerns.

When my son was in kindergarten a man approached the playground fence and offered him a puppy if my son were to meet him after school. Luckily I pick my son up everyday from school, and he told me about the incident as soon as he saw me. That is the kind of person I fear. Someone who is close by and has opportunity to access my children.

Your children come into contact with strangers all the time. The ones that stand behind you in line at the grocery store. They engage you and your children in conversation. “Oh, I bet you’re about 4 years old. Am I right? You look about 4 to me.” Now the door is open because either you or your child responds. “why yes she is 4.” “Do you go to preschool? I have a grandson that’s in preschool” He just said the magic words. Grandson. Now we know he is okay. And we will continue to offer up what we think are insignificant details about our child. Now a complete stranger knows your child’s name, age, quite possibly where they go to preschool. If this stranger is shopping at the same store as you chances are they live close by. The stranger has gained the confidence of the child because afterall mommy wouldn’t be speaking to a bad man.

It’s times like these when we need to be paying attention. But many of us would not give this type of interaction a second thought. Virtual monsters can’t hurt me. It’s the monsters that live next door that I worry about.