Tag: courtesy

Today I was the rude one at the doctor’s office. Hayden and I were sitting by the television (because the first thing Hayden will tell you about the doctor is “Doc’tor? Wats deetee! [watch TV]!”). Another mother was checking in and her two children came to sit by the TV, too.

The older child, a boy about five or six, sat with Hayden on one of the little kiddie benches. The younger child, a girl about three years old, started picking up and moving the other kiddie bench a couple inches at a time, dropping her weight on it with each step.

It was one of those omniscient mommy instinct moments—I knew this wasn’t going to end well as she approached me. But I was trying to read a really great article (which I’ll probably write about soon, if I can find it on the Internet, or I’ll have to wait until I can photocopy it), so I didn’t pay quite enough attention.

Sure enough, within seconds, she hopped the bench right onto my foot.

“Ouch!” I said. “Please be careful!” (I might have even asked her to apologize, and she might have done it. Note that her mother was still busy checking in—I have far more patience with mothers who are actually clearly doing something that makes it difficult to monitor their children than mothers who are literally staring off into space instead of making sure their children aren’t hurting other kids/ME. Yeah, that happened.)

“That was my sister,” said the little boy.

“Yeah. . . .” I said. “And that was my foot.” I’m a terrible mother.

As I spent almost an hour waiting for my son’s doctor to see him, I noticed your children playing in the waiting room. Some of you went to great lengths to keep your children entertained and keep them from disturbing other waiting families. And, sadly, some of you seemed to think that a large open space meant that you could let your children do whatever they wanted.

I understand that you have several children to tend to at once, and I know it is very hard to keep tabs on one child while tending to another’s needs. Or staring off into space. Perhaps you thought that I was also letting my son wander unsupervised.

However, I was watching him very carefully (I’ve already seen The Jungle Book, anyway). And I was watching your children. I watched when your 3-year-old yelled at my 2-year-old for approaching him. Hayden was not going to steal his chair, actually; he just wanted to see the fish (and try to put my car keys in the lock on the fish cabinet). I heard your child yelling at mine over the noise in the already-crowded waiting room and I was a good 20 feet away, while you were maybe five feet away.

I watched when your 5-year-old lectured my 2-year-old about not touching the television, when it was two feet above his head. I also watched while she told me in a similarly condescending manner that she was telling her brother not to touch it, though she had her back to her brother while she was speaking, and proceeded to encourage him to jump in the air and catch on the edge of the television’s wall-mounted shelf. (I hope it’s okay that I told them to stop because they could tear it off the wall; it looked heavy and no one wants to get hurt here.)

I watched as your child climbed onto the table. I saw you stare off into space, look at your son sitting on the table, and go back to staring off into space. My son, thinking that this had to be some sort of game, actually had the gall to touch the table. Thankfully, your son smacked my son’s hand. That showed him. Showed him real good. Too bad you didn’t notice.

Going to the doctor is far from fun. Going with several children can be extremely stressful. But, please, can we try to at least monitor our children? My son is far from shy, but he has never been so bullied as he was by children whose mothers were standing right there as we waited in the doctor’s office waiting room. Please, just because it might be safe to let the kids run wild there doesn’t mean you should.

(After the waiting room, Hayden’s appointment went well. I got the answers to questions that I needed (and the answers that I wanted to hear, even!). Hayden was not shy for the doctor, even wanting to sit on his lap. He only had to get one shot, which he was very brave for!)