I have a habit of referring to my children by nicknames. A lot of nicknames. I used over 50 nicknames for Hayden in his first year. When Hayden first started saying his name, he said it “Haydie.” He’s only recently begun calling himself “Hayden.”
(Break here: he has a friend named Sadie. They were playing last week. When Sadie left, Hayden looked around and asked “Werse (where’s) Sayden?” Nice analogous learning, boy!)
There’s one nickname for Rebecca that I feel a twinge of guilt for using: “pretty girl.” Aside from the fact that this sounds like a form of address for a pet, calling my daughter pretty girl incites all kinds of crazy fears in me.
What if she becomes stuck up or haughty about her appearance?
What if she has no self-esteem about her appearance?
What if she infers that she has nothing else to offer?
What if she never hears her mother call her pretty?
What if none of this really matters?
I’m probably reading too much into a nickname that comes pretty much naturally to me.
Do you have any nicknames that you keep calling your kids, but you don’t really want to?
14 replies on “Pretty girl”
LOL. We have nicknames for all of the girls. I started calling Hannah, “Hannah Banana” pretty much from birth – figuring that she’d hear it eventually and if she was already used to it as a term of endearment then it wouldn’t be a big deal later on. I do call each of them ‘pretty girl’ every so often, but I guess I do try to avoid it when I think about it. I think that it’s not really a big deal though, since they’ll know in other ways that they’re valued for more than just being pretty… 🙂
Well, we still refer to our lil gal as a lil “varmint” sometimes. I promise, that is supposed to sound loving and endearing, not derogatory. I just hope people don’t think we REALLY think she’s a pesky rodent carrying a variety of harmful diseases…
I have been calling Avery Pretty Girl too. I probably should think twice!
@Zabs—I’m sure Deb’s right; it’s not that big of a deal.
@Elisa—Varmint = totally acceptable. My gramma called me that all the time. But as a side note, for the longest time I thought the word either was related to or simply was the same as “vomit.” I believe there’s some cute family story about that…
Maybe that’s why Jeffrey gave people blank stares until he was almost three when people asked his name…I hadn’t thought of that. I pass all sorts of nicknames between my boys. Bubba is a common one, but practically every time I say it I picture a large, scary, dirty man and wonder why I’m calling my skinny little kids that. I’m trying to morph that one to just “Bubs,” which reminds me of Homestar runner…maybe in a few years all the nicknames will just remind me of my cute boys’ faces. And hopefully they won’t cause any psychological damage.
P.S. I think pretty girl is fine as long as your not dressing her in “spoiled brat” shirts and letting her use make up when she seven years old:)
I have nicknames I use, but I don’t mind using them. I call my older daughter, Pumpkin pie and honey bear. (pumpkin pie came from the fact that when she was little, I called her pumpkin and honey pie eventually they got smushed together into pumpkin pie) I call my baby girl, Mag-pie and honey bunny.
Lillian’s name is Lillian Day so I often call her my day lily. Or even Lilly Day. It lends itself to a lot of fun nicknames.
We called Drake (our 6-year-old son) “Bugsy” for the longest time, starting at about 2 weeks old…but then the nickname just kinda died out. I guess around the time baby #2 was born 18 months ago. Maybe he just seemed to old for it or something? We still occasionally call him “Bugs” for short, but I really have to work at it because it no longer comes naturally. It actually makes me a little sad, because I thought he would always be Bugsy. We call Levi (the 18-month-old) “Bucky” – and it’s still going strong. It gets shortened to “Buck” a lot, and I think it may stick a little better, because it doesn’t seem as babyish.
Bud. I cannot believe that “bud” and “buddy boy” come out of my mouth spontaneously in reference to both boys.
I didn’t realize how often I say it until I heard my 3yo daughter calling P “Buddy Boy” as if it were his name.
We called Samuel Buddy so much when he was younger that he would respond to it if anybody anywhere called out, “Hey buddy!” Everybody still calls Esther pretty girl and, guess what, she is convinced she’s pretty. I think that’s great, and I think it only gets messy when you don’t teach your kids to value other people in addition to themselves. I try to point out other kids to her, “Look at her hair, isn’t it pretty in braids?” in an effort to get her to appreciate the beauty of others.
My Paw Paw called my Uncle Paul “boy” so much Uncle Paul was convinced that his name was Boy A. Lastname.
@Sarah—that’s a great point! (But I thought you weren’t supposed to be reading blogs today!)
I don’t think there is anything wrong at all w/ calling “pretty girl”. When she gets bigger so many insults: sad but true will be thrown at her and her first memories of Truth will be her being Momma’s Pretty Girl.
Go for it Jordan.
I call all of my kids angel babies. I call the baby by our last name.. hope she doesn’t think it’s her first…
We call our one year old “the lil’ chunk chunk.” He’s always been a big boy (born 11 lbs.) He’s not even really chunky anymore, but the name stuck.
I also can’t stop calling him Baby Bop. It reminds me of Barney the big purple dinosaur’s friend Baby Bop and that annoys me. But it just fits him! 🙂