Categories
Kids/Parenting

Empathy at 19 months?

Is it possible for children to be empathetic at nineteen months?

Of course, the question requires a little explanation. (Okay, so maybe it doesn’t require it, but you all want to hear the story, right?)

I’ve mentioned that Hayden’s favorite show is Yo Gabba Gabba!, yes? So naturally, I’ve been taping episodes just in case the virulent people dominating the discussion at Nick Jr.’s Yo Gabba Gabba! message board succeed in taking the show off the air and forever scaring my child.

And, since Yo Gabba Gabba! is the only show he watches, we rewind the tape and watch the show at least three times a day. By now, we’ve watched the “Sleep” episode a total of six times (it also happens to be the first one that we ever watched).

The first three times we watched it without incident. But the last three times, one song in particular really seemed to disturb Hayden. It begins with Muno (“he’s tall and happy”; the red cyclops) tossing and turning. He can’t seem to fall asleep, and is feeling sad and lonely—and whimpering appropriately.

The rocks in Muno land come to life and sing a song with him, telling him to “Think happy thoughts, happy thoughts / That’s what you gotta do. / Think happy thoughts, happy thoughts / and a smile’ll come back to you.” But before that can happen and reassure his friend, Hayden was in tears—full out crying. He calmed down a bit when I (and the second time, Ryan) came to sit with him and sing the happy thoughts song. (The third time I think was influenced by his fever 🙁 .)

So what do you think? Could Hayden be feeling empathy at nineteen months or was it just a really sad song?

Of course, there are many things that Hayden does that are totally normal for a nineteen month old. Like

Hayden covered in ketchup
love hot dogs and ketchup,

Hayden wearing mom shoes
wear mama’s shoes, and

Hayden hamming it up
ham for the camera

Hayden hamming it up again
(a lot).

Categories
Random

I’m a Total Blogger!

If you’ve been here before, you probably already knew this, but I figured I’d make it official:

The mom blogger quiz from MamaBlogga

Are you totally into blogging, or your kids? Take my quiz to find out!

Of course, this quiz is not to indicate whether or not you have children, nor is it to indicate whether you love them more than you love your blog. It is for entertainment purposes only. It doesn’t matter whether you’re more of a blogger or more of a mom according to this quiz, you’re a mom and a blogger—and that’s okay. We know you love your kids more than your blog.

Take the MamaBlogga Mom Blogger quiz!

Categories
Kids/Parenting

Hayden and his best friend

Hayden’s best friend lives with us. Whenever he sees her, he stops whatever he’s doing to hug her and play with her. If she’s laying around, he’ll throw himself on the floor just to talk to her.

Hayden and his best friend, Whiskers

Hayden and his best friend—Whiskers.

Categories
Fulfillment

The sometimes impossible balancing act of motherhood

A few weeks ago, I wrote about how I’d finally begun to find a balance between trying to act as if motherhood hasn’t changed my life and my schedule at all, and totally accommodating my son.

Of course, this balancing act of motherhood changes nearly every day. One day, you can hardly pick up a gallon of milk; the next, your children sit through an hour and a half of grocery shopping without complaint.

But as your children grow and change, and sometimes our family expands, we are constantly having to adjust. Finding balance is a balancing act in an of itself.

And even if you do find balance, it doesn’t mean that your point of balance is necessarily an easy or leisurely one. Because being a mom just isn’t easy all the time. And it seems that sometimes “balance” is less a give-and-take between mom and baby and more of a “how much are you willing to give” for mom.

Wesley Jeanne at Mountain Mama wrote about this over the weekend.

I remember at my cousin Stacy’s baby shower (before kids for me), her older sister Karyn gave us both the advice that we should fit kids into our lifestyles rather than fit our lifestyles to our kids. I nodded sagely, sure of the wisdom of her advice. After all, at the time I thought it ridiculous if my friends with children wouldn’t do something because it interfered with nap time or was too inconvenient for the kids. I swore I wouldn’t be like that. When I had kids, I would be flexible, relaxed, I would have them adjust to my life.

You’re smiling. I know. I was delusional, wasn’t I?

Two kids later I do try to be flexible. I won’t bar the door and turn off the telephone and block all outside light during nap time, for example. My kids have learned to nap in a house that is impossible to keep dark and silent (I have a dog, I have neighbors, I don’t even have curtains on many of my windows).

But as a mother I also have to be aware at all times of the needs of my children. I am painfully aware of what happens when they don’t get enough sleep, when they get overstimulated, when their routine gets thrown for more than a day. Children need for parents to be flexible, but they also need structure. It just works better that way for all of us.

Although Wesley Jeanne goes on to acknowledge that it’s very hard to accommodate your schedule to your children, and being a prepared-mom-on-the-go is actually a lot more work than it looks like, I think the above statements show that she gets the underlying idea: a mom tries to be flexible and have fun with her kids, but at the same time, she has to put her kids’ needs first.

Of course, it’s easy to say that and know that, and another thing to do that. So head on over to Mountain Mama and show your support. Because sometimes, that’s what a mom really needs to feel better about this balancing act.

Categories
MetaBlogging Contests

Popular parent bloggers updated!

Remember back in April when we first published the Popular Parent Bloggers awards? Well, we’ve finally gotten around to updating the list! Check out the updated list (or the original one) today!

Categories
Kids/Parenting

Guest post: The Real Secrets of Parenthood

Today is our first guest blogging post! If you’re interested in writing a guest post for MamaBlogga, read Get the Most out of Guest Blogging!

With a degree in Journalism, Cardiogirl has always been a careful observer of the world around her. She has worked in journalism, graphic design and marketing/advertising. Now a stay-at-home mom of two three daughters, she blogs daily at Cardiogirl.net: 19% body fat, 100% fun. To read more of her writing, subscribe to Cardiogirl!

The Real Secrets of Parenthood

When I was pregnant, and it became obvious, everyone told me how much my life was going to change. The main comment was about the lack of sleep that was in store for me. How I would be stumbling about wishing I could sleep for just 45 minutes uninterrupted. After I had the baby that did end up being true, but I always wondered why the only thing people had to say about a new child was negative.

I try to be positive when I see a pregnant friend and simply say, “Congratulations, how exciting!” because a new baby is exciting. I don’t want to contribute to the pessimistic karma following my fellow gestating sisters. But now that I have children, I feel that there are a few more secrets out there that parents guard fiercely, yet nod sympathetically when asked about.

Secret Number One: Teething is a drag.

It really is. It can start as early as three months old but will be in full force by the time your little peanut is six months old. It consists of red cheeks (on the face), excessive drooling, fever (sometimes) and constant crying and crankiness. It’s real fun. This does not end until your baby has roughly 20 teeth. Yeah, 20 times you’ll go through this. Keep the Motrin handy and don’t be afraid to use it. Liberally.

Secret Number Two: Potty Training is also a major drag.

It’s hard to teach a small child how to suddenly change a habit that is genetically ingrained. “No, no, honey. When you start to let your bottom relax (what does relax mean, Mommy?) stop and run to the toilet.” Yeah. It’s sort of like trying to teach a 2-year-old Greek and quantum physics at the same time. How do you explain what your bladder/bowels feel like to someone who doesn’t know the feeling since their body just takes over and relieves them of the discomfort? How do you capture a moon beam in your hand? How do you stop the rain from falling? It ain’t easy.

Secret Number Three: Vomiting/Diarrhea sucks it like no one’s business.

At some point in time either before, during or after Secret Number One and Two your sweet little baby will get the flu. Sometimes you will experience just one side of this dastardly duo: perhaps just diarrhea. Believe it or not, that is a blessing. It’s when your baby starts vomiting (and sometimes toots out a package in the diaper while simultaneously projectile vomiting) that the fun begins.

Why just two days ago I was vomited on three times. Yes, while I was holding the baby. Yup, all over the front of my shirt as well as on her shirt and pants. We had numerous baths and outfit changes that day. I tried to imagine I was modeling the latest fashions in Milan and this was just one more costume change before I made it back out on the catwalk. That didn’t help.

I’m just saying that every step of parenthood is fraught with challenges. It’s a completely different culture and once you join the ranks you, too, will be privy to the secrets. Whether the new parents down the street realizes that or not, they will be initiated soon enough.

So next time you see a pregnant woman, simply say “Congratulations.”

Thanks for sharing your guest post with us, Cardiogirl! Now, leave a comment here and head on over to Cardiogirl.net for more great writing!